13 December 2011
11 December 2011
03 December 2011
As a follow up to my previous post:
Why does it matter to you (the general you) whom I am attracted to and whom I am engaged in sexual relations with?
Unless I am asking you out or hitting on you and you aren't interested for what ever reason, then it doesn't matter. If I am asking you out or hitting on you and you aren't interested, a simple "Sorry man, not my thing" is sufficient.
Unless I am asking you out or hitting on you and you aren't interested for what ever reason, then it doesn't matter. If I am asking you out or hitting on you and you aren't interested, a simple "Sorry man, not my thing" is sufficient.
Warning: Self-disclosure and ranting!
There is an (in)famous bear website with numbers in it's name this is known for it's size and hirsuiteness discrimination. My partner was silently rejected for membership. Why? He doesn't know. He was just rejected.
I joined an alternative site that was founded to get away from the capricious behavior of the owner of the previously mentioned site.
Tonight, one of the members of the site I'm on (the alterantive site) posted that he had engaged in his first heterosexual experience the night before and and enjoyed it.
The comments that followed were what I should have expected but to have others tell me that it is "to be expected" really set me off.
So, you're on a site that was founded to get away from the behavior of a site owner who engaged in random member rejection based on unknown standards, who filters out content in site IMs, and yet I (and other bisexuals) should *expect* to be harrassed and discriminated against?!
From time to time, I think that the gay 'community' (there's a misnomer) has come so far and it has. Just don't look under the hood or you will find the duct table and chicken wire that holds it together.
Sadly, I'm starting to believe that the only reason that the GLBT community has gotten as far as it has is because of the HIV/AIDS crisis.
If we had not had that horrible destruction of so many people and lives in the 80s and continuing on through the present, I don't think that the "community" would have any unity at all.
I am rarely fully open about my bisexuality. I have not had sex with a woman since 1995. I did enjoy it, I do occasionally miss it, but it's not what I want in the big picture. I don't get that bonding experience with women like I do with men.
Many of the straight people who I have met (not friends, but acquaintances) and who have found out that I am bisexual generally start in on the "Oh see, you just need to get back into woman and you'll be married in no time"
Gay men are all about the 'OMG! You put your junk where?' and how could you do that..and then a pouring out of all the stereotypes about women (holy misogyny!).
It's just easier to lie and say I'm gay. I don't need a lecture about how I need to find the right woman or how I must have been drunk or worse to have had sex with a "fish".
For the love of all that is right, we've battled HIV/AIDS with the lesbians who helped run the organizations that saved many gay men going unsung. We've battled to become publicly accepted and not be based, discriminated against, or looked down on...
But yet, in our own community, bisexuals are the ones on the "wrong side" of the tracks. There's still open disdain for the bisexuals.
I won't even go into the twinks vs bears vs ... yeah. *sigh* We have made much public progress but in private (our own spaces and communities) we have much to do.
I know that most people who read my blog do not know that I am bisexual. If this changes your opinion of me, well, I'm sorry. I can't deal with this constant putting down of the bisexuals from both sides.
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