Post-Ritual Notes

Jim and I completed his part of the ritual this evening.

All went well aside from the fact that we both revealed more about each other to each other than either one of us expected.

He now fully understands that I do have a romantic interest in him, but that I also realize that I have no chance with him at all. He's actually relieved because any ambiguity about where he stood with me has been resolved. I found out some of his deepest darkest secrets and well, they aren't that deep or that dark. Uncommon yes, deep and/or dark no.

I have a much better understanding of Jim now and I realize that as wonderful a man he is, he is much more a friend who can teach me about myself and my spiritual gifts.

I respect Jim. I think he is a wonderful man and I realize that he is someone very special and powerful who has entered my life with many lessons to teach me. I am lucky as well to be able to offer what I know to him to help him learn about himself.

You know, before I would have cried, whined, bitched, and complained to the God and Goddess for teasing/tempting me with someone like Jim. Now I realize that he was put here to show me that friends come in all varieties and that friendship is more important than a relationship.

I still would like to have a man in my life, but the burning desire to have a man in my life has been greatly quenched by realizing that I've looked too hard and too long for something that just needs to happen.